My mother never practiced yoga.
She never studied comparative religions
or sought to find herself in the silence
of rustic mountain retreats.
Her mudra was a cigarette poised
between the fingers of her right hand
and a coffee cup cradled in her left.
Her mantra was simple.
With a slow exhalation,
she would bring it forth
from the silence–
“You just never know…”
I invoke her wisdom
when a driver cuts me off in traffic
and I want to feel compassion
instead of rage—
You just never know where he’s going
or why he’s racing to get there.
I seek her grace
when I feel inclined to roll my eyes
at a woman in the supermarket
holding up the line while she fumbles
with a bundle of coupons—
You just never know if her children
had enough to eat last night.
I think of her when I look at
myself in the mirror
stretching my limbs
in a sun salutation,
her voice urging me
to create space for compassion.
Oh how I love this poem. You just never know. I love the anti-heroics of the mother, how relevant, how apropos in every situation.
Thank you so much for your kind words, Rosemerry. I love your poetry and to receive such a thoughtful comment from you is indeed a great gift. You are the reason I carry exclamation marks in my pockets! Thank you.
Mmm.
This same gift was given me by my high school driver’s ed instructor, of all people. So my picture of compassion is an older white male sports coach, who reminded us that we never know why that person is driving so fast or erratically, maybe they are racing to the hospital with a hurt child in the back seat of that red sports car… you just never know. Give them grace, let them cut in front of you, wish them well, and everyone will get home safer. I still think of that every time I am tempted to get mad when I’m scared, or to get frustrated when my plans are interrupted, and I’m now in my 50s.
Thanks so much for your kind words, Heather. And many thanks to your driver’s ed teacher too!
I first found this poem in Poetry of Presence II and I was looking for it just now to refer on to a friend. I’m so grateful to have found it here. The poem haunts me (in a very good way) and I’m so grateful you shared it, AND some sense of your mother with us all. Thank you!
Fabulous poem–especially for the times we’re in, but for all times. May we all teach this to our children…