I have attained three supreme mystical powers. I am going to teach them to you, if you are ready. These siddhis overcome all obstacles, stun all enemies, and open all the portals to the Infinite. Normally I would keep them a secret, only for the initiated, but because we are nearing the collapse of the empire, I must share them with you in hopes that you will use them as talismans for your journey.

These three mystical powers have been hidden for thousands of years in the monasteries of the Himalayas, but they must now be revealed. Of course, you received these secret initiations when you were a baby in the crib, goo-gooing, burbing and farting, muttering “Ga!” “Hu!” “Mama!” “Bha!” and other bija mantras of supreme wisdom. But you exchanged your radiance for an education. Now you must be re-initiated by a fool, so that you can become one.

1. FIrst, whenever you are sad or angry or confused, take it as a sign to abandon your mind. Sink down into your body. Feel your heart-beat. Just stop whining, fall down, and enter your heart-beat.

2. Don’t take your next breath, receive it.

3. When you’ve fallen into your heart-beat and realized that every breath is a gift to be received, not taken, then offer the gift back to the Giver, slowly breathe out, and listen. Listen to what? Between breathing out and breathing in, listen to the quietest most distant sound. Just for a moment. This moment is an eternal door. This door is in the center of your chest, between going and coming, between beats, where there is no journey, no thought, no “I.”

Listen to what? Listen to the space beyond the faintest sound. Listen to the vibrating aliveness of listening itself. Listen to the symphony of your flesh, the chorus of electrons, the song of distant stars falling into the neurons of your solar plexus. Drown in the hum of silence.

~

(Now you must pay me. Here is your initiation fee. Because if you don’t pay me, the mystical power of these secret techniques will not be activated. OK? So please send me tidal waves of compassion. Forgive me for ever having imagined there was anything to learn but listening, pulsation, and friendship with your own heart.)